Lamentations of a mother of teens

Happy Mother's Day dear readers (or not)! I have pawned off my kids to extended family to celebrate my special day because I have to work tonight, but that's okay. I wish I were writing a warm, fuzzy post about the wonderful, thoughtful gifts my loving and grateful children presented me with right after my breakfast in bed tray was removed from my lap this morning. Or even a description of the beautiful flowers they bought me to plant in my flower pots in the back yard since that's (was) our thing for the past few years. Alas, this entry will be a little different.
It all started last night when I informed my two angels that we would be attending 8 o'clock mass at our own church in the morning and then they would be spending mother's day without me at their Aunt Shannon's with the rest of my family. The hour was late as I had let them entertain their company until midnight (I, too, was watching a movie with Mike who wasn't so much watching as snoring, but I'm not judging!) before I chauffeured the friends to their humble abodes. Alisa insisted that she was NOT getting up in six hours for church and she was NOT going to be in a good mood. So, I could just forget about trying to be all happy-go-lucky with her-harumph! (Okay, so she didn't really harumph but she might as well have). Aaron launched into a self-absorbed soliloquy about how we "agreed" that if I was going to force him to go to church after the recent declaration of his conversion to atheism that HE would choose the church we attend. He hasn't been to our church since his announcement, and his Tia told Fr. LeDoux about the atheism thing, and everyone's attention will be on him as the "atheist in the pews." The focus will not be on Mothers around the world just because it's Mother's Day but instead it will turn into the Spanish Atheist Inquisition and Aaron will have to defend his new-found views to the mobs of angry Christians....
Let me get back to this lovely mother's day morning. I gave Alisa until 6:30 before I gingerly flipped on the hall light and told her to get up and get ready for church. 7:00 o'clock rolled around (did I mention I was up washing last night's dishes and fixing breakfast? Yeah, happy mother's day to me, indeed!) and she had turned her back and pulled her covers over her head. I peeled back the covers and kissed her warm cheek and told her again it was time to get up. We needed to leave by 7:30 to pick up Tia and be on time for mass. 7:10 was somewhat of a red-rage blur involving covers being yanked off of a still snoozing child (who's bigger than me, mind you), a swift swat to the behind, and yelling "GET OUT OF BED AND GET READY FOR CHURCH NOW, RIGHT NOW, NOW!"

Anyway (cue "you don't bring me flowers, you don't sing me love songs, etc...), I thought I'd just jot down a few words to my children in honor of this mother's day (and they will be few as I'm not in my uniform and still need to eat & dress in the next 15 minutes)

Dear Aaron,
I love you no matter what. I may not agree with your newfound views on religion and your renunciation of your faith which I have tried to instill in you, but I love you just the same. As a teenager, it is your job and duty to be self-absorbed and put your own feelings before anyone else's, so I forgive you for crapping all over my "special" day with your "it'll be all about me if we go to OMM" protestations last night and this morning. I hope you enjoyed the time with your cousins while I worked on Mother's Day because, after all, you need new earbuds and headphones every other week, and a kid needs a cell phone if he's gonna be section leader, and you'll need a "Macbook" when you go off to college...and the list goes on!

Dear Alisa,
I love you no matter what. You asked if I "believe it's right to hit another person"? My answer is not really. I shouldn't have to resort to acts of physical violence to get my kids to do what they should be responsible enough to do on their own...like set an alarm clock, get up on time and get ready for church in a timely manner. That swat on your butt is what finally spurred you into action even if you were absolutely ugly toward me all day as a result. I forgive you for treating me the way that you do. As a teenage girl, it is your job to push me away and make me want to throttle you so it won't hurt so bad when it's time for you to leave the nest and make your way in this world. I love you even when you push me away and deny me "sugars" and roll your eyes every time I open my mouth regardless of what I'm about to say.

Dear friends,
I wish your all the blessings of being a mother on this mother's day. Hope your day was happier than mine. Now, I'm off to care for the sick and hurting and healing who will no doubt appreciate me more than my own family (even if it is only for the dilaudid and phenergan I provide).  Until next time...